Introduction
It is no doubt that old age is becoming a social problem in today’s society. The questions that most people in their late 50’s will ponder: “How do we see ourselves when we are in our 60’s, 70’s, 80’s and upwards. What is our main concern? Health? Financial independence? Privacy? , etc “
With the increasing rate of population of senior citizens in Malaysia, there is a need to look into their well being which has become an urgent issue. People cannot ignore the fact that parents and children are no longer staying together because of logistic and their careers. Often in the rural areas, only the old folks are left behind and they have to depend on neighbors usually of the same age group for help if they fall sick. One encounter I came across was an old lady whose only daughter was not able to take full care of her due to her heavy job commitment and when she fell sick, she was sent down to Kuching General Hospital for treatment by a kind neighbor. She died two weeks later.
The trouble with old people is that whenever they are faced with the natural old age problem especially the feeling of uncertainty in life they tend to think negatively. They agonize over the decision that has to be made in view of the fact they can no longer live alone independently. The grown-up offspring are torn between their careers and may find their elderly parents a burden.
Retirement
The recent announcement of extending the retirement age in the civil service from 56 to 58 is good news for most civil servants who still have children going to school and bills to pay. But what will happen when they reach retirement age? With the increase in prices of the basic needs of food and fuel and the high cost of living, can they make ends meet after retirement? The rate of inflation is seen to rise year after year causing a heavy burden for the retirees.
However, in Malaysia employing retirees or senior citizens is not favorable as it deprives the younger generation of job opportunities. When I was in Singapore, I saw a lot of senior citizens working in coffee shops; their main agenda was to get paid and to make themselves useful in the society.
When I spoke to friends and government employees , I found most of them did not have a positive reaction towards retirement. They would say, “I do not know what to do.” Again it depends on individuals in how they see and accept the reality of life. Being involved in the community and utilizing what you are good at will gradually make you enjoy the life of being a retiree. In general, the most satisfying moments for retirees are good health, freedom from time commitment and being financially independent.
Statement of Problem - The Aging Factor
Social problems that most old age people are facing now are becoming so critical that it may affect the whole society. Growing affluence coupled with a more health conscious society, better health care and longer life expectancies are seen pushing the population of old age people to rise sharply in the last number of years. In Malaysia the statistics for old age people is increasing quite rapidly which is not surprising.
Busy working children have in fact reported complaints of depression and anxiety because of the perceived stress that results from the demands of caring for their elderly parents.
Facts of Life
Aging is inevitable and is often associated with illness, weakness, disability and a deterioration of physical abilities and mental health. Everyday every one of us is getting older. There are two factors that rule our lives which are health and life expectancy.
By year 2020, a third of the population in most developed countries will be pensioners and the retired population is getting bigger and bigger.
With the fast changing lifestyle in today’s society, the younger generation is striving hard to earn their living and cannot even afford to support their elderly parents.
In reality, the biggest concern in this society is health care and ageing parents that has become a threat to the society. The reality of taking care of aging parents is becoming a burden to the younger generation when they find themseleves no longer useful.
The Generation Gap - Fear of growing old and living alone.
Coming from the general statements of old aged people staying alone by their own choice; they preferred not to burden their children. One example is my mother who has been living alone for more than 10 years. Only when her health failed her, she felt her life was restricted by having to stay with her children. She was no longer able to have her freedom but was dependent on the lifestyle of others which was not her choice.
That has become a burden to our generation to think whether it is fair to our children when we grow old and have to live alone.
Research statements from today’s society have confirmed most aging parents still prefer to stay by themselves. The following reasons are why they do not want their children to look after them:-
• Lifestyles are different
• Financial constraint that can cause conflict in the family
• Loss of independence/freedom
Senior Citizen Care Home
Although the idea of this kind of home is not encouraged in our society, still one has to accept the fact that when both husband and wife are working leaving the old folks at home with a maid , there is a danger that she may abscond at any time with no supervision at home. This has happened quite often as reported in the papers.
Similarly like having a Child Care Centre, there is also a need to have a Senior Citizen Centre. Commonly known as “Retirement Village” in countries like Australia, New Zealand and western countries, this concept proves to be very popular, safe and elderly persons can enjoy a relaxed, friendly and secure life style with nursing care.
In Sarawak, The Home for the Aged in various divisions is run by charitable bodies with assistance from government. Owing to financial constraint, these homes only provide basic needs and may not have adequate facilities.
There are some private homes in Kuching opened to provide such services of health care and comfort to the old aged people like the D’Cottage, Comfort Nursing Home, Splendid Care Center and the Lion Nursing Home. In most cases, the children are away working outside Sarawak and overseas leaving their elderly parents behind, giving them no choice but to pay for the service to these homes to take care of them .
In Sibu, there are such centers operated and self- financed by their own churches.
In Miri, the only Home for the aged was established by the Miri Chinese Charitable Board in 1913. It was originally meant to house the Chinese traders from China who came over to Miri to work leaving their families behind. The tradition of providing accommodation for the singles still continued. Those elerely people neglected by their children were accepted by the centre to house them and that has become their home.
A prominent businessman in Miri has in mind to set up a retirement village based on an Australian concept. The village will have one bedroom houses and come with with facilities such as medical service and of course all expenses will have to be borne by the children.
Conclusion
Although the government has given special attention to the retirees like having half fare on airlines, free medical treatment in the hospital, still a caring home would be a bonus for them. This will give a clear and more positive outlook that the children have the sense of responsibility to take care of them by paying the expenses for the service in the centre. The traditional values of filial piety still exists but it is being observed in a different perspective.
It will foster a better and healthier relationship between the aged parents staying in the Care Center and the immediate families. Both parties will not feel guilty for imposing an emotional burden on their children whilst the latter will not feel guilty of not fulfilling their filial duties to their aging parents.
If both the government and the private sector are able to set up this kind of Care Home with medical facilities, using overseas retirement home as benchmark, it would present a comfortable feeling for the ageing parents and their children to look forward to a better lifestyle.
There is a saying which goes like this:-
“What you get is living; what you give is a life.”
And when we grow old, we are like children that needs care and tender love.
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